Washington Watch Hollywood Edition: Comedians Eddie Griffin Sinbad And Joe Torry (VIDEO)
Last year the craziest panel that we had on the Washington Watch Hollywood Edition was our comedians panel, so we had to do it again. This time Eddie Griffin, Sinbad, and Joe Torry join Roland Martin on Washington Watch for this year’s comedians panel.
MR. MARTIN: Folks, last year the craziest panel we had was our comedians panel, so we had to do it again. This time, we have Eddie Griffin, Sinbad, and Joe Torry.
Gentlemen, welcome to “Washington Watch.”
OFF CAMERA: Thank you.
OFF CAMERA: [Crosstalk.]
MR. MARTIN: All right. Lots of stuff happened in the news; but, look. I play golf. Joe play[s] golf. You two hate golf, so I[’ve] got to start –
SINBAD: No, I didn’t –
MR. MARTIN: — with golf.
SINBAD: — say – we just said we don’t play. If Eddie – if I choose – we chose to play –
OFF CAMERA: Yeah.
SINBAD: — it’d be brutal.
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.] But I thought you – you made it clear you hated it. You –
SINBAD: I –
MR. MARTIN: — couldn’t stand it.
SINBAD: — I –
OFF CAMERA: No.
SINBAD: — played w- — I could play it well. ’Cause I hate it don’t mean I can’t play it well.
MR. MARTIN: [Laughs.] Okay.
MR. JOE TORRY: Yeah.
OFF CAMERA: Right.
MR. MARTIN: I would say that’s spin – right there.
MR. TORRY: Yeah, he – yeah, he was sayin’ somethin’ else, though – [crosstalk] –
MR. MARTIN: Right. I don’t know what he talkin’ about – but I gotcha.
MR. EDDIE GRIFFIN: — right. No, I –
MR. MARTIN: But here’s the deal.
MR. GRIFFIN: — can play.
MR. MARTIN: So, in the news –
MR. GRIFFIN: [Crosstalk.]
MR. MARTIN: — in the news –
MR. GRIFFIN: But –
MR. MARTIN: — Tiger Woods –
MR. GRIFFIN: — I don’t like the game.
MR. MARTIN: — you don’t like the game?
MR. GRIFFIN: Don’t –
MR. MARTIN: Why?
MR. GRIFFIN: — like the game.
MR. MARTIN: Why?
MR. GRIFFIN: It take too long, man.
OFF CAMERA: Thank you!
MR. GRIFFIN: You got all that land –
OFF CAMERA: Thank you.
MR. GRIFFIN: — out there. People are homeless.
OFF CAMERA: Thank you!
MR. GRIFFIN: You could build some houses, feed some people, and yo’ lil’ rich behind out here –
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. GRIFFIN: — smackin’ a ball two thou- — man, come on!
MR. MARTIN: Now, there’s bruthas all across America in – in the ’hoods left and right, not – not rich, but they love playin’ a game of golf.
SINBAD: ’Cause –
MR. TORRY: Yes, they do.
SINBAD: — they don’t wanna be with they wives.
MR. GRIFFIN: Exactly!
MR. MARTIN: [Laughs.]
MR. TORRY: That’s a –
SINBAD: If you –
MR. TORRY: — that’s a reason.
SINBAD: – you wanna –
MR. TORRY: That’s a reason. [Chuckles.]
SINBAD: — see golf? You wanna –
MR. GRIFFIN: But it is –
SINBAD: — see golf?
MR. GRIFFIN: — a good reason, though.
SINBAD: You want me – [crosstalk]?
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: That is a good –
SINBAD: Well, that’s –
MR. GRIFFIN: — reason.
SINBAD: — how golf was invented.
[CROSSTALK.]
SINBAD: Over – over in Ireland, when they invented golf, there – this is why we have 18 holes. They ran outta beer? ‘Member? They drank ‘til a case was gone. It came to 18 holes. They said, “Where else legally can we be gone from” – “four hours from our wife, and they can’t get mad?” Golf. If you want the golf game to end, if a wife start comin’, men will quit playing golf.
MR. MARTIN: Oh, really? That’s how it’s gon’ happen?
[CROSSTALK.]
SINBAD: Am I lyin’?
MR. MARTIN: Now – now, one person who hasn’t quit, but he’s all of a sudden comin’ back is Tiger Woods.
OFF CAMERA: Yes.
OFF CAMERA: Thank you.
MR. MARTIN: Tiger Woods.
SINBAD: We knew it was gon’ happen.
MR. MARTIN: You happy to see him back?
MR. GRIFFIN: Yes – [crosstalk].
SINBAD: I knew it was gon’ happen. It was comin’.
MR. MARTIN: So, what – what was your advice? Wha- — what – what made Tiger get his act together, and all of a sudden he’s performin’ better in golf tournaments?
MR. GRIFFIN: He finally realized that havin’ a stain on his perfect image –
SINBAD: Is good.
MR. GRIFFIN: — is a good thing.
OFF CAMERA: It’s a good thing.
MR. GRIFFIN: So, he’s dealin’ with, you know, what, you know, the rest of us Black men on this panel –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: — been dealin’ with our whole lives. You know, it’s just born bein’ Black; but, you know, he’s been Complicasian [sic - phonetic] and other –
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. GRIFFIN: — you know, mixed-up –
SINBAD: A- — and he – and he grew – he grew the goatee.
MR. GRIFFIN: — you know.
SINBAD: He grew the goatee.
MR. MARTIN: He grew the goatee.
SINBAD: And it happens, too, like you say, marriage – divorce – remember it takes a year. This is like death. ’Member it takes a year. He’s outta the – he realized that she done got a new man. She built a house. He’s like this.
MR. GRIFFIN: With his money.
SINBAD: Thank you. He’s like this.
MR. TORRY: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: [Crosstalk.]
SINBAD: “Oh, I got to make more money.”
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. TORRY: You know –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. TORRY: — his mind is a lot clearer –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. TORRY: — and he’s probably back to doin’ what he was doin’ when he was winning championships, us- –
MR. GRIFFIN: And that’s – that’s visitin’ –
MR. TORRY: — usin’ –
MR. GRIFFIN: — at least 12 hookers a day.
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. TORRY: — u- — yeah, usin’ every club in –
MR. GRIFFIN: Because if –
MR. TORRY: — his bag.
MR. GRIFFIN: — I was of his sponsors –
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: — I’d ’ve sent ’im ho’s.
SINBAD: He played every club?
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. TORRY: Every club.
MR. MARTIN: [Crosstalk.]
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: He was winnin’ tournaments when he had ho’s.
SINBAD: What’s that mean?
He said he’s playin’ every club. What’s that mean?
MR. TORRY: He’s playin’ every club in his bag – the ones down in his bag, the ones – [crosstalk] –
MR. MARTIN: Now, right now, Sinbad has no idea –
SINBAD: I don’t know –
MR. MARTIN: — what you talkin’ about.
SINBAD: — what you talkin’ ’bout.
MR. MARTIN: He has –
SINBAD: [Crosstalk].
MR. MARTIN: — no idea.
SINBAD: No, no, no. I mea- — I just – I don’t – what does that mean?
MR. TORRY: Well, see, you know, a – a – a golf bag, you have a certain –
SINBAD: I know, but –
MR. TORRY: — amount of clubs.
SINBAD: — it’s – some cats won’t use all their clubs for some reason?
MR. TORRY: Well, I mean he – he was usin’ his clubs he was born with.
SINBAD: Oh, okay.
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. GRIFFIN: See, I knew this was goin’ –
MR. MARTIN: Oh, now – now – [crosstalk] –
MR. GRIFFIN: — somewhere.
MR. MARTIN: — this was goin’ –
MR. TORRY: See – see, man.
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. MARTIN: — to somehow degenerate, and so –
OFF CAMERA: No!
MR. MARTIN: — I – we – we –
MR. TORRY: — [crosstalk] – and – but – but for real. That – I think that makes champions win.
MR. MARTIN: Now, I gotta ask you –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. TORRY: Right?
MR. MARTIN: — we’re gon’ stick about – stick on sports. Jeremy Lin.
OFF CAMERA: Yes.
MR. MARTIN: Everybody’s –
OFF CAMERA: Yeah.
MR. MARTIN: — goin’ –
SINBAD: I love ’im.
MR. MARTIN: — nuts about Lin and the Knicks.
SINBAD: I love ’im, but if you look at his history – go on and look at ’im when he was playin’ at Harvard. He was dunkin’ with two hands, blockin’ bruthas’ shots. He – in the D-League, he was up to 25 points a game. Cats were watchin’ ’im. Coaches were watchin’ ’im like this. “I don’t belie-” – if you’re scoring 25 against bruthas every night, you averagin’ that point, why are you not – especially the Lakers talkin’ ’bout –
OFF CAMERA: Right.
SINBAD: — “The Lakers passed on ’im?” [Slaps the desk.] That’s why y’all cain’t win nuthin’.
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
SINBAD: But, um –
MR. GRIFFIN: [Clears his throat.] Lawd Jee-zus!
MR. MARTIN: Now, Flo- — now, Floyd Mayweather bashed ’im by sayin’ –
SINBAD: That was wrong.
MR. MARTIN: — “Well, bruthas” –
SINBAD: That was wrong.
MR. MARTIN: — “doin’ this” –
SINBAD: That was wrong.
MR. MARTIN: — “all the time.”
MR. TORRY: Well, you know, Floyd ain’t got nothin’ else to do between fri- — fights – between fightin’, valeting[?] – you know what I’m sayin’?
MR. MARTIN: [Laughs.]
MR. TORRY: Gettin’ into it with his – gettin’ into it with his many girlfriends.
MR. MARTIN: [Laughs.]
MR. GRIFFIN: An’ goin’ to court.
MR. TORRY: See what I’m sayin’? [Crosstalk] – pick on people on the Internet.
[LAUGHTER.]
MR. TORRY: “This time, it’s[?] – [unintelligible].”
MR. GRIFFIN: [Crosstalk] –
MR. MARTIN: [Crosstalk] – you think –
MR. GRIFFIN: — I think –
MR. MARTIN: — about that?
MR. GRIFFIN: — I think Jeremy Lin is – is a good American story. I think –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: — that’s why everybody’s gravitatin’ around it, you know –
OFF CAMERA: Yeah – [crosstalk].
MR. GRIFFIN: — ’cause as a kid, you know, looked like he was about to get kicked off the Knicks in ’bout five days.
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.] R- — right.
MR. GRIFFIN: And to show ya how God work, everybody on the team got injured.
MR. MARTIN: Right. He was –
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: Those –
MR. MARTIN: — he almost [?] –
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: Coach –
MR. MARTIN: — had to end up –
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: — Coach – [unintelligible] – looked down at the end of the bench and said, “Well” –
SINBAD: “[Crosstalk] – didn’t grab me at first.” [Unintelligible] – like this. He said –
MR. GRIFFIN: No, he –
SINBAD: — he didn’t want to –
MR. GRIFFIN: — he looked down. He lifted his –
SINBAD: — put him in there, ’cause –
MR. GRIFFIN: — head. He was like, “Man!”
SINBAD: — he didn’t wanna look desperate. Coach said –
MR. GRIFFIN: Then he said, “Aiight.”
SINBAD: — “I didn’t wanna look desperate.”
MR. GRIFFIN: “Go ’head. Go ’head. Go ’head.”
SINBAD: He goes[?], “I wasn’t gon’ play Jeremy Lin ’cause I didn’t wanna look desperate.”
And Jeremy’s like this. “I’m shootin’ every time.”
MR. MARTIN: [Laughs.]
MR. GRIFFIN: “Every time” – yeah.
OFF CAMERA: Yean, for real.
MR. TORRY: Because you don’t know –
SINBAD: He had confidence, man.
MR. TORRY: — you don’t know –
SINBAD: That’s right.
MR. TORRY: — your –
MR. MARTIN: Right.
MR. TORRY: — when’s gon’ be your next chance.
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. MARTIN: You know, you might get cut.
MR. TORRY: For real.
SINBAD: But he’s a pure –
MR. TORRY: Come on.
SINBAD: — point guard[?]. You notice as – as Amarie came back, his ti- — his points were down, but he’d get more assists. I cain’t wait ’til Miller come back. He’s like this: “I’ll score 40 while y’all need me,” but whe- — he’s like Nash. He’s like this. Morris like this. “Oh, I had Nash” – he’s just throwin’ a rock up.
MR. MARTIN: No- –
SINBAD: “Here I go.”
MR. MARTIN: — now – now – now, we are in LA, and speaking of somebody who[’s] throwin’ stuff away, Kobe. Ko- –
SINBAD: Back with his wife now.
MR. MARTIN: — talk about ha- — now – now – now, here’s the deal, though.
SINBAD: Back with his wife.
MR. MARTIN: Now, di- — did somebody hit Kobe? “I got to give up how much money?”
[CHUCKLING.]
MR. MARTIN: He said, “I better reconcile” –
SINBAD: Naw.
MR. MARTIN: — “real” –
SINBAD: Know what –
MR. MARTIN: — “quick.”
SINBAD: — happened? He realized he was renting, and she had three mansions.
MR. MARTIN: [Laughs.]
SINBAD: See, they were – they were showin’ three mansions he was renting. And they were sayin’, “Turn your music down!”
OFF CAMERA: Um-hum.
SINBAD: He said, “I gotta get a house of my own” –
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
SINBAD: — “so I can turn my music back up.”
MR. GRIFFIN: I think what it was, man – I don’t even think it was all Kobe. You know, you gotta look –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: — at the other side of that equation also. You know what I mean? She’s comin’ in at a certain age. You know what I mean? When they got together – you know what I mean – she was –
SINBAD: Seventeen? Sixteen?
MR. GRIFFIN: — yeah, she didn’t even know herself yet.
SINBAD: Yeah –
MR. GRIFFIN: – you know –
SINBAD: — cheer- –
MR. GRIFFIN: — what I mean?
SINBAD: — -leader.
MR. TORRY: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: So, you know – and Kobe gon’ do what Kobe gon’ do. He’s a ballplayer, you know?
MR. MARTIN: Yeah, but –
MR. GRIFFIN: What can –
MR. MARTIN: — yeah, but he together[?] –
MR. GRIFFIN: — I tell ya?
MR. MARTIN: — but he – but he got smart, ’cause he said, “I gotta give up a who-o-ole” –
MR. GRIFFIN: No, I think –
MR. MARTIN: — “lotta money.”
MR. GRIFFIN: — I think she got smart, ’cause she looked around after they had –
OFF CAMERA: Who is she gon’ date[?]?
MR. GRIFFIN: — they lil’ – you – you – [unintelligible] – Sinbad?
SINBAD: Who she gon’ date?
MR. GRIFFIN: What you gon’ do? Everything else is – [crosstalk] – down.
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. TORRY: But – but a- — a- — as a man who has a daughter – you know what I’m sayin’ – you – you get to thinkin’. “I don’t want no other man around my daughters.” You know, “Let me get back around my” –
[SINBAD AND MR. TORRY FIST BUMP.]
SINBAD: Yes.
MR. TORRY: — “queens” –
SINBAD: His kids.
MR. TORRY: — “my princesses” –
MR. MARTIN: Ah! Good –
SINBAD: He loves his –
MR. MARTIN: — point.
SINBAD: — children. He said –
MR. MARTIN: Good point.
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. TORRY: [Crosstalk] – sometimes you can take it on the chin –
MR. MARTIN: Yeah.
MR. TORRY: — for the – f- — you know, for – for –
MR. MARTIN: Good point.
MR. TORRY: — the whole family.
MR. MARTIN: Now, s- — now –
OFF CAMERA: But –
MR. MARTIN: — now speakin’ of that – you talk about wives. We always talk about Pres. Barack Obama. If you were Pres. Obama –
OFF CAMERA: Ooh!
MR. MARTIN: — and you’re watchin’ TV, and you were seein’ these folks doggin’ your wife, how would you respond?
MR. TORRY: She[?] need – [crosstalk] –
SINBAD: I’d be in prison –
MR. TORRY: — no, no.
SINBAD: — right now.
MR. TORRY: No- — now –
SINBAD: They’d say –
MR. TORRY: — see –
SINBAD: — “He used to be a president” –
MR. TORRY: — that’s why –
SINBAD: — “but he shot somebody one night.”
MR. TORRY: — that’s why certain people don’t have power.
MR. GRIFFIN: No, but –
SINBAD: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: — what I’m sayin’ is –
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
MR. GRIFFIN: — who – who’s doggin’ his wife?
MR. MARTIN: Well, you know, different –
SINBAD: Naw!
MR. MARTIN: — commentators, and[?] they –
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. MARTIN: — talk about –
SINBAD: [Unintelligible] –
MR. MARTIN: — talk about her arms –
SINBAD: — they got mad ’cause she was in shape –
[CROSSTALK.]
SINBAD: — like this – all them biceps.
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: What we talkin’ ’bout? You know what I mean? It’s par for the course. She’s the First Lady. She’s the first Black First Lady.
SINBAD: Yes.
MR. GRIFFIN: They talk stuff about us, and we di- — you know, we ain’t done it.
SINBAD: Yep.
MR. MARTIN: But if you – but –
MR. GRIFFIN: You know what I mean?
MR. MARTIN: — but if you were Obama – and, literally[?] – now, you a bruh.
OFF CAMERA: Yeah.
MR. GRIFFIN: I wouldn’t –
MR. MARTIN: — and they –
MR. GRIFFIN: — play to it.
MR. MARTIN: — you wouldn’t play to it?
MR. GRIFFIN: I’m the President!
MR. MARTIN: Joe –
MR. GRIFFIN: Why I’mma s- –
MR. MARTIN: — how would you –
MR. GRIFFIN: — why I’mma –
MR. MARTIN: — respond?
MR. GRIFFIN: — [crosstalk] – down?
[CROSSTALK.]
MR. GRIFFIN: I wouldn’t even play to it.
MR. TORRY: [Crosstalk] – I mean Secret Service. I’mma send them cats, you know, that you ain’t gon’ hear about no more.
MR. MARTIN: The – [crosstalk] – Secret –
[CROSSTALK.]
OFF CAMERA: No, no. The black ops.
MR. MARTIN: The folks who took out Osama bin Laden?
MR. GRIFFIN: Yeah, them – them dudes.
MR. TORRY: Let me sa- — when I – when I – when I do comedy, I go on tours. I – we got some weapons out there. It’s a ship – you wouldn’t even have to come out – they don’t have to come out the ship.
SINBAD: Naw.
MR. TORRY: Punch in yo’ address –
MR. MARTIN: [Cracks up.]
MR. TORRY: — pu- — you – your phone. They’ll send a missile dead in yo’ back pocket, if they have to.
MR. MARTIN: [Still laughing.]
SINBAD: I’d pass a new law.
MR. TORRY: “Boom!”
SINBAD: Pass a new law. “New law: you talk about my wife, you go to prison.”
MR. TORRY: Um-hum.
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
SINBAD: “You go to prison. And we take all your stuff. I get to keep it.”
And I’d be on TV wit’ yo’ stuff, with your hat on.
MR. GRIFFIN: Umph!
MR. MARTIN: [Chuckles.]
Folks, I am out of time. Give it up for Eddie Griffin, Sinbad, Joe Torry.
